7 начина да помогнете на децата си да развият добро психично здраве
WHAT DOES “GOOD MENTAL HEALTH” ACTUALLY MEAN?
Good mental health is mainly about the capacity to perceive things calmly. “Children with good mental health are capable of feeling a set of pleasant and unpleasant emotions, without high distress levels”, doctor Nicole Berkens, clinical psychologist says. “This means they could manage negative feelings such as bitterness and offence and not to break down when unexpected or disappointing things happen. They are capable of coping with challenges and could keep moving on after failure. The psychically sound children could also adapt to change (within reasonable limits) and are not afraid of new experience”, she adds. Of course, all this keeps developing as the child grows, whereas a 2-year-old copes harder with new situations than the child aged 12. The temperament of your child also matters since more cautious children could be more stressed in new situations than bolder children. “Confidence and stamina would change depending on child’s age and stage, as well as its temperament”, doctor Vanessa Lapointe, children psychologist and pedagogue said. “It is important not to pathologize what is typical and normal development for every child.”
STRATEGIES FOR MAINTENANCE OF YOUR CHILD’S MENTAL HEALTH
The most important factor for good psychic health of your child?
“Indicator number one according to the literature on mental health in childhood is the strong relation parent-child” – Lapointe says. “So, keep nurturing this relationship, be close to your children, take care after your own mental health and well-being so that you could support your children.” Here are some particular techniques you could use in order to strengthen the relationship parent-child and improve your child’s resilience and adaptability.
Be an exemplary model – “The way parents cope with things such as disappointment, challenges and negative feelings plays an important role in how children learn to react”, Berkens says. “If children see a parent who reacts to disappointment with anger and gives up, for example they would be inclined to welcome disappointment the same way. A parent who expresses excessive fear of new things and tries to protect the child from situations that could cause some pain or disappointment would probably also have a child that is more timid and introvert.”
Limit the time your child spends in front of screens – The American Academy of Paediatrics recommends no time spent in front of the screen (except for video chat) for children aged below 2 years and only one hour of quality children programs for children aged from 2 to 5. Limitation of the time spent in front of the screen improves mental health. “Digital era makes our children look for support in the devices and not to refer to their friends” Lapointe says. Yet limiting the time spent in front of the screen does not refer only to children – you also need to leave your phone and demonstrate your children the opportunity of balancing between using digital devices and other life activities, Berkens says. “Also, it is important for parents to spend time with their children every day”, she adds “since this maintains healthy parent-child relationship and promotes child development from each and every aspect.”
Stop buzzing around your children – You have heard of parent-helicopters (buzzing above the child to make sure everything is going OK) and snow-machine parents (who make pathways for their child so that he or she does not have to face bumpy roads). Even if well-meaning, this type of parents actually limit the development of their children while not allowing them to feel disappointments or overcoming difficulties. “Let your children try climbing something little bit higher than before or cope with the arrangement of puzzle that is new to them. Do not immediately intervene to rescue them if they encounter a problem but support them to gather the experience to cope successfully with something little bit harder. This is the perfect opportunity to promote and support them.
Provide your child with the opportunity to try new things, maybe fail in these and then try again, while meanwhile creating the prerequisites for “smooth landing” if something goes wrong”, Lapointe says.
Take care after the physical health of your child – Physical health impacts the mental, so make you’re you provide the best constituent elements for both. “Balanced nutrition contributes for high spirits, attention, anxiety and behaviour”, Berkens says. “Children who consume food poor in nutrients are exposed to higher risk of mental issues.” Make sure your child has enough sleep is also essential for the mental health, she adds, since poor sleep could result in bad moods, weaker emotional resilience and bad coping skills.
Talk with your child about the way he or she feels – The opportunity to share their feelings in healthy manner is essential for the good mental health. “Children should be allowed to feel sad, disappointed, hurt and should be supported in overcoming these feelings in suitable manner”, Berkens says.
Highlight the positive – Appraisals by parents could help improve your child’s self esteem yet the best appraisal is for their efforts, not for their success. “Pointing out the things your child does well and the ways in which you notice he or she is successful is a good start”, Berkens says. “Nevertheless, it is even more useful to praise the efforts that you see your child is making, so that he or she could develop positive feeling for him/herself”.
Show them that making mistakes is normal – You do not want your child to be making mistakes as a rule, yet make sure that you allow him or her to see your own erroneous steps. “Outlining the mistakes you make help children see everyone makes mistakes and there is nothing scary about this”, Berkens says. This would help them avoid anxiety and stress that perfectionism brings about and built positive, healthy feeling of self-respect.
Source: thebump
